1. Thought oh, I'll make dinner. I have all the ingredients for mini pesto/prosciutto pizza cups.
2. Can't find the muffin tin in which I make the mini pizza cups.
3. Can't find any cookie sheets on which to bake pizzas.
4. Realize I don't have any mozzarella that is not in the form of string cheese. Tear up string cheese to put on pizzas.
5. Decide to make mini pizzas on the pizza stone in the oven. Brilliant!
6. Read instructions on pizza dough container. Preheat oven to 475 (F)
7. Assemble pizzas.
8. Put pizzas on pizza stone.
9. Read instructions on pizza dough container. Set timer for 13 minutes.
10. Child spills huge glass of water all over everything in dining room.
11. Oven starts pouring out smoke.
12. Mommy starts to go insane opening windows and trying to remember where the smoke detector is so that I could turn it off.
13. Child starts going "what's happening? Can I help?" and getting underfoot.
14. Mommy moves fan from bedroom into kitchen, whacking child in the head in the process, due to item number 13.
15. Fan does not help.
16. Mommy remembers the pizzas. Opens the oven to take a look. After the smoke clears, realizes that all of the pizzas have burned.
17. Daddy, who has been recovering from a respiratory illness, comes home to find the house full of smoke. Starts coughing. Not good.
18. We scrape the tops off the pizzas and eat. The tops were good, if a little smoky.
19. The apartment still smells of smoke.
20. Begin consumption of alcohol.